Being given responsibility

[Cimarron]

A lot of times, I hear that SJs like being given responsibility (not necessarily authority). I can think of a lot of cases, though, where I did not want it, because I was afraid of letting others down.

So do you like being given responsibility? To know that others are depending on you? When yes, and when no?

This is probably a difficult question to answer, because choices like this seem to happen on the subconscious level (totally making this up, but who's keeping score?).

[Beat]

Depends. If we feel confident we can handle the responsibility, sure, I even enjoy it but if not, it's just a weight on the shoulders and added stress. I think that speaks for most people though...? Well, I guess there are those that escape responsibility at all costs...

They don't call us the duty fulfillers for nothing, I don't think. It's a big part of how we "grade" ourselves, by taking on responsibilities and hopefully excelling at them.

[Cimarron]

Originally Posted by Beat

Depends. If we feel confident we can handle the responsibility, sure, I even enjoy it but if not, it's just a weight on the shoulders and added stress. I think that speaks for most people though...? Well, I guess there are those that escape responsibility at all costs...

Yeah, to me it did kind of seem general enough to apply to anybody, which makes me wonder why they think it's worth mentioning in SJs more than others.

[Beat]

Check my edit. There might be more to it but I think it kind of nails it. hah

[Cimarron]

Good call. There may be something to that.

[substitute]

I find this interesting (if I may interject, not being an SJ )

I don't tend to assume responsibility voluntarily, being naturally inclined to self-doubt and fear that I'll fail. But if someone gives it to me, I take it as a compliment; a vote of confidence that helps override my own insecurity and do the job full justice to repay them for this much appreciated trust they've placed in me.

[Jeffster]

Originally Posted by substitute

(if I may interject, not being an SJ )

No you may not.

[Anja]

I see this pattern in my very ISTJ husband. Any group he belongs to he soon rises to an authoritarian position. He can be very clear about goals and needs. He is also exceedingly clear about his methods being the best possible choice. And he is frequently correct.

Little by little he assumes responsibility for nearly everything, becomes tired, then sometimes resentful that others aren't pulling their weight but he has already usurped their responsibility.

It looks like a trap, this pattern. In getting his needs for order met he also becomes thwarted in contributing to group harmony and cooperation.

[bbites]

Hmm. I don't like being automatically given responsibility. If someone else can't handle it than I'll usually step in and take over but usually for selfish motives; like group work at school, I won't volunteer to be the leader but if the leader isn't "leading" than I'll step in and do whatever needs to be done to save my grade. But in general I get anxious about taking the reigns, so to speak. Too much pressure.

[Recoleta]

First off, yes, I think there is a big distinction in wanting to have responsibility and wanting to have authority.

Authority I am not such a fan of...it is the one aspect of teaching that I likely find the hardest to deal with. I don't like making decisions that people will be unhappy with, but I also realize that things need to get done and I can't make everyone happy. I usually end up being too diplomatic and accommodating and people take advantage of that.

As for responsibility, it can go either way. I like it when people come to me and ask me to lead...kind of like what Substitute was saying...because those people have seen some sort of quality in me that they think would be right for the job. Also, that way, if things go badly, I can simply say, "Hey, I gave it a shot, but I didn't ask for this position so you should be unhappy with yourselves for putting me there." (This hasn't really happened though, I'm just speculating).

I'm also ok with taking over when the current leader is incompetent...if I find the other person to be incompetent it means that I know I can do the job better. Plus, I'm probably better with responsibility/authority in this position, because when I'm ticked off, I go into major productivity mode and I don't care what other people think and I tend to lose that whole diplomatic, soft side to myself...I just get stuff done.

Usually though, I never volunteer for responsibility or authority roles unless no one else wants to do it (teaching is different because I'm not leading peers or my elders). I prefer to be assigned something, and I'll get it done.