In your opinion, which is true?

[Hmm]

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" or "Out of sight, out of mind"?

[Jack Flak]

Days or years?

[disregard]

Both can be true.

Out of sight, out of mind rings true if you're not invested in someone anymore or if you weren't to begin with.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder rings true if you're significantly invested in them.

[Hmm]

I dunno. Both? Any? All of the above?

[Jennifer]

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" or "Out of sight, out of mind"?

I think ultimately the "absence" thing works for a bit... and then invariably the body will seek to accommodate the loss by deadening the emotion. If you live without someone long enough, you'll change to accommodate the hole and slowly fill it in, even if it can never be completely filled.

(There are also some people who can grate on you if you're around them all the time, but having them in "healthy doses" makes them palatable and even desirable.)

[phoenix13]

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" or "Out of sight, out of mind"?

I'm gonna go monkish on you and answer in parable:
Love is a fire. If it's small, the wind will blow it out. If large and strong, the wind will feed it.

[evan]

Both I guess.

False dichotomy.

[PinkPiranha]

I still think of people I haven't seen in years and can miss them.

Out of sight, Disregard is correct. It's evidence of perhaps a lesser investment?

[Jennifer]

I still think of people I haven't seen in years and can miss them.

Yes, that is the "Fond of" factor for me -- I'm okay without them, but sometimes I'd just really love to have them around, and it's like they're still with me somewhere in there even when I haven't seen them for years.

Out of sight, Disregard is correct. It's evidence of perhaps a lesser investment?

Maybe.
I don't know.
I just find myself disconcerted sometimes at how I can stop missing, to some degree, and even enjoy myself apart from people I've told myself I deeply care about. :(

Is my investment as deep as I had wanted to believe, or am I just a flooze?

[Randomnity]

Either can be true, depending on the situation (length of absence, investment, mood, etc). Especially length.

I think some absence and some presence are necessary for everyone, to somewhat varying degrees. Either one to excess can be harmful.

[disregard]

Naturally there will be exceptions to cliches like these.

[JonJT]

I'm skeptical that absence is the only state that produces a feeling of fondness within the context of this thread. Examining the time which has elapsed between said persons current state and said past state is important. Large absences in both time and distance have made me fond or reminiscent, but it was not the physical absence per say, that induced this feeling. The reflection upon my growth in all facets of life as well as reflection upon the innocence I once had induces feelings that, in absence of a more suitable word, could be described as fondness.

[EffEmDoubleyou]

Both can be true.

Out of sight, out of mind rings true if you're not invested in someone anymore or if you weren't to begin with.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder rings true if you're significantly invested in them.

Word.

[Edahn]

When they're closure, "Out of sight, out of mind," but without closure, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," in my experience, and generally speaking.

[ceecee]

Neither. If I had to choose one for my own situation it would be...Absence makes the heart grow fonder. But not an extended one. I like my alone time but I don't want so much that I start to forget.

[FDG]

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" or "Out of sight, out of mind"?

Neither, but if I really had to choose, I would go with the second, and that is also the reason why I don't like long distance relationships.

For me it doesn't work that the less I can see a person, the more I like them; or the more a story is turbulent, the more I like it, etc etc; it's completely nonsensical, it'd be like saying that if there's something I like doing I prefer doing it once every 2 months rather than once a week. Even if I am very invested, I will eventually stop caring after some months I don't see the person.

[Uytuun]

how I can stop missing, to some degree, and even enjoy myself apart from people I've told myself I deeply care about. :(

Is my investment as deep as I had wanted to believe, or am I just a flooze?

Can relate. Although I'm not that bothered by it. Stuff, people fade away rather fast.

[Rachelinpa]

Absence makes the heart grow fonder... of somebody else!

I think some absence and some presence are necessary for everyone, to somewhat varying degrees.

I agree with this.

[Bufo]

Both. Depends on your intention.

[Mitzy]

out of sight out of mind

always