All's fair in love and mystery?

[SparklingImpediments]

This is something which has recently intrigued me... especially when comparing Ts to Fs or maybe it's Ps vs. Js. Let's be brutally honest here... Do you like it when he/she lays all her cards on the table (would you even put love in that analogy?)? Or do you prefer the chase/mystery of a romantic affair, the whirl-whim of uncertainty... essentially would you prefer he/she not tell you how he/she feels about you right away because for some inexplicable reason your passion mounts with agonizing anticipation when he/she only hints at what "could be"?

[Tallulah]

That's a good question. I think the answer lies somewhere between. I hate it when people deliberately play games--but then I've had guys be so up front that there was absolutely NO mystery, and therefore, they weren't very interesting to me. There are certain "games" that are just part of the dance, like keeping enough distance in the very beginning, so as not to look desperate and stalkerish.

[Magic Poriferan]

I don't seemed to be turned-on by holding back at all. I want to know everything.

[Night]

Knowing everything means discovering nothing.

That's what marriage is for.


Cherish the hunt.

[SparklingImpediments]

So... thus far the general consensus is to conceal most and reveal just the right amount... Is that what romance is?

[colmena]

I wouldn't need everything. I would enjoy just being together. I don't think it takes long to know all that is important about a person. As long as I trust who I'm with, I wont be consciously holding anything back; and I hope for similar in return. I will say things as they feel comfortable to say.

I find relevant honesty -- or generally brave expression -- very attractive.

Let it flow, I say. Romance never goes deep enough.

[Alpha Prime]

Do you like it when he/she lays all her cards on the table (would you even put love in that analogy?)? Or do you prefer the chase/mystery of a romantic affair, the whirl-whim of uncertainty... essentially would you prefer he/she not tell you how he/she feels about you right away because for some inexplicable reason your passion mounts with agonizing anticipation when he/she only hints at what "could be"?

A woman who layed everything out on the table in an instant would make me run away so fast that I would make the earth rotate atleast twice as fast around its' axis..

Where is the thrill, if not in the hunt?

[SparklingImpediments]

I wouldn't need everything. I would enjoy just being together. I don't think it takes long to know all that is important about a person. As long as I trust who I'm with, I wont be consciously holding anything back; and I hope for similar in return. I will say things as they feel comfortable to say.

I find relevant honesty -- or generally brave expression -- very attractive.

Let it flow, I say. Romance never goes deep enough.

Well, I certainly think that's most reasonable... and as time share's her wisdom, I find the "game" rather inane.

For what it's worth, you seem to be a couple steps on the "thinker's" side of the fence, then not.

[Enyo]

This is something which has recently intrigued me... especially when comparing Ts to Fs or maybe it's Ps vs. Js. Let's be brutally honest here... Do you like it when he/she lays all her cards on the table (would you even put love in that analogy?)? Or do you prefer the chase/mystery of a romantic affair, the whirl-whim of uncertainty... essentially would you prefer he/she not tell you how he/she feels about you right away because for some inexplicable reason your passion mounts with agonizing anticipation when he/she only hints at what "could be"?

I prefer to be worshiped. Seriously, I love it when I am treated like an absolute queen, but that gets old rather quickly if he also can't "put me in my place" and tell me no.

A little bit of chase for me is a good thing, because if I could have him too easily, then there was no real challenge. Also, the ones that didn't give me any challenge also ended up not being a strong enough personality for me, which would quickly lead to boredom and being discarded.

[Hexis]

Even though I will get frustrated at some point and just start wanting to pull my hair out concerning not knowing everything, it is most definitely much funner to just receive hints here and there.

Long live the hunt!

[pure_mercury]

I like honesty and open communication, so it would be refreshing to me to hear exactly what my new (hypothetical) gf was thinking. Of course, I wouldn't want to hear talk of commitment and marriage a few weeks into the relationship (that is a sign of something unsettling). As I get older, I think I'd rather know where I stand so I can assess what I am doing from my end.

[Thursday]

if i deserve her and she wants to give herself to me(vice versa), no hunt needed.
the banter will be plenty.
the only running need be done is sweat and ......

[disregard]

As I can generally sense what has yet to be said, just as I can see through inauthenticity, it's of little importance to me whether or not they let the "cat" ouf of the "bag". Such professions are really superfluous and even off-putting, as their significance is dwarfed by action and follow-through.

[FDG]

Well I don't like idiotic mysteries of the kind "does she have feelings for me, or not?" and I don't like push-pull. I don't ask my gf to tell me everything about her past - I don't care - but I definitely want to be certain of her attitude towards me. So, I guess I am one of the "up-front" kind. I know some girls don't like it. My attitude is, they just don't know what they're missing out on :P

[Grayscale]

i dont have time for games, we got places to go! that about sums up my opinion on the matter.

forced romance seems boring to me, there is far more mystery in discovering someone through mutual experiences. that's the best way to discover their less apparent facets.

[CzeCze]

In answer to the OP: It should play out naturally. If it feels forced or wrong, either you're not doing it right or it's not meant to be.

Some types, some people get it more naturally than others. And it also has more to do with the chemistry involved between the people than how "smooth" a person is.

Like other 'social' or 'life' skills, it will get easier as you get more experience and get older. Or at the very least you'll figure out what you are willing to do and not do and your own style.

Basically, the more you figure yourself out and what/who you like and how things 'usually' work out, it will get easier and hopefully more enjoyable. :)