Has anyone called you a sore loser?

[Algora J]

I have an INTJ male friend, and oh boy! does he not like losing an argument. We recently played chess together, and I won all 4 times which made me very annoyed with me.

So I have a question for you NT folks, when you lose, how graceful are you?

[Enyo]

Depends on how much I care about the competition. :-)

Edit: There are some things that I know that I'm not very skilled in. I expect to lose when I play certain games against my husband. In those cases, not so much. But when it's something that I'm skilled in, I don't like to lose.

[BlackOp]

We very rarely lose the war...may drop a few battles here and there. I only get mad if I beat myself. :doh: If he's annoyed with you...you've got his attention. Thats a victory in itself.

[EffEmDoubleyou]

I HATE losing. The Gauntlet put me in a funk for days. While I have not been called a sore loser, I have been accused of being that guy that always takes a fun game too seriously. "Chutes go DOWN, you sonofabitch, ladders go UP. I swear, what are you, like three years old? Oh, you are."

[disregard]

HAHA

[PinkPiranha]

I HATE losing. The Gauntlet put me in a funk for days. While I have not been called a sore loser, I have been accused of being that guy that always takes a fun game too seriously. "Chutes go DOWN, you sonofabitch, ladders go UP. I swear, what are you, like three years old? Oh, you are."

I've graciously kicked someone til they fell down and then cursed them to their 5th generation.

Yeah. Little old Bingo ladies *totally* had it comin'.

[Economica]

So I have a question for you NT folks, when you lose, how graceful are you?

I know I used to be a very sore loser, even if I like to think I've always tried to contain my reaction (as opposed to blowing up at the winner; how transparent and pathetic is that?). I feel I've gotten better - losing stings less and I need less time to recover - but I rather think there's a long way to go still before the term graceful will apply to me. :rolleyes:

[Terian]

Well, to be called a sore loser, first you have to lose. ;)

[Algora J]

Depends on how much I care about the competition. :-)

Edit: There are some things that I know that I'm not very skilled in. I expect to lose when I play certain games against my husband. In those cases, not so much. But when it's something that I'm skilled in, I don't like to lose.

My point is that it doesn't matter if you're skilled at something or not, the whole point is the adherence to diplomacy if indeed you do lose.

I've always had the philosophy that if someone is right and better at you than something, then better learn from that individual. However, with my particular INTJ friend, I think now he's holding a slight grudge towards me!

I sense some jealousy issues on his part, but I haven't brought it up.

[Algora J]

I know I used to be a very sore loser, even if I like to think I've always tried to contain my reaction (as opposed to blowing up at the winner; how transparent and pathetic is that?). I feel I've gotten better - losing stings less and I need less time to recover - but I rather think there's a long way to go still before the term graceful will apply to me. :rolleyes:

Yes, well I certainly gather that is the case with INTJs! :D

[Not_Me]

Never lost before, so I don't know.

Actually, I don't get upset from losing itself. I see it as an opportunity for improvement. My attitude is more dependent on how the winner behaves when he wins.

[Algora J]

Never lost before, so I don't know.

Actually, I don't get upset from losing itself. I see it as an opportunity for improvement. My attitude is more dependent on how the winner behaves when he wins.

There's nothing wrong with gloating and giving someone the high five if you do win.

I remember once I was in court for a speeding ticket, and the judge took my side to the police officer, and when the trial was over, I went over to shake his hand, and he left in an angry rant without shaking my hand.

I thought, "What an unprofessional dweeb." and chuckled to myself. :devil:

[Enyo]

My point is that it doesn't matter if you're skilled at something or not, the whole point is the adherence to diplomacy if indeed you do lose.

I've always had the philosophy that if someone is right and better at you than something, then better learn from that individual. However, with my particular INTJ friend, I think now he's holding a slight grudge towards me!

I sense some jealousy issues on his part, but I haven't brought it up.

Diplomacy? *looks confused*

I'm not *mean* to someone who beats me. It doesn't happen often enough. ;)

Seriously, when I lose, it's usually that I'm pissed at myself for not doing better than I did, not at the other person for doing better than me. I'd always explained it this way: I don't want to win because the other person does badly. I want them to do well, too. I just want to do better.

[Algora J]

Diplomacy? *looks confused*

I'm not *mean* to someone who beats me. It doesn't happen often enough. ;)

Seriously, when I lose, it's usually that I'm pissed at myself for not doing better than I did, not at the other person for doing better than me. I'd always explained it this way: I don't want to win because the other person does badly. I want them to do well, too. I just want to do better.

I feel that way in competitive sports. I don't need to be No.1. But you don't get better at tennis by playing with a partner you can always beat.

[Not_Me]

There's nothing wrong with gloating and giving someone the high five if you do win.


Playful gloating is fine. But some are really smug and will hoot and holler for so long that they risk suffocation.

[BlackOp]

"Chutes go DOWN, you sonofabitch, ladders go UP. I swear, what are you, like three years old? Oh, you are."

:1377::harhar::1377: :laugh::laugh:

[PinkPiranha]

Well, to be called a sore loser, first you have to lose. ;)

Quantum Teleportation = epic Fail. ;) *poke*

[Terian]

Quantum Teleportation = epic Fail. ;) *poke*Heh, I didn't think of it, I just played around with one of my brother's ideas. And technically, it's teleportation though quantum means.

I guess my record remains clean. ;) *poke*

[PinkPiranha]

Heh, I didn't think of it, I just played around with one of my brother's ideas. And technically, it's teleportation though quantum means.

I guess my record remains clean. ;) *poke*

All right, all right, keep your hadron in your pants. :D

[Hmm]

Edahn had better answer yes to this question cause I'm calling him one.

[PinkPiranha]

Edahn had better answer yes to this question cause I'm calling him one.

He's a crier too.

[sriv]

I have been, but the comment had no basis.
When I lose, I look over my mistakes, and identify how I can improve.

[FDG]

I'm a sore loser only against computers, because I think they might be cheating.

[EffEmDoubleyou]

I'm a sore loser only against computers, because I think they might be cheating.

They totally cheat in Madden football. If you're like 10-0 or 11-0 in your season, the computer's going to pick one game where NOTHING goes right for you and you get destroyed no matter what you do, just so you don't go undefeated. A sportswriter I like calls it the "No F***ing Way" game.

[Mondo]

I would call myself a sore loser at times.
I can get pretty competitive when I want to.

[murkrow]

umm...

not sure.

probably in the past, but not recently.

[substitute]

Depends who the opponent is and what I've lost at.

If I lose a game of chess, even to a 9 year old child (as I regularly do), I laugh and say well done. I've long understood why it is that I suck at chess - short attention span and also, EP is very strong in me, so if what I'm working at has no continuous use in the external world, I quickly lose interest and can't really engage in the first place.

If I lose an argument because someone's reasoning and knowledge was superior to mine, I usually give way pretty graciously.

If I 'lose' an argument - i.e. it's over and I'm perceived to have lost - because the other person stamped their foot and screamed and said I was horrible but didn't actually listen to or understand my points, then again, I can be pretty gracious. I used to find it very frustrating and proceed to despise that person, but now I let it go cos I figure, y'know, life can't be much fun being them. And I've learned with people like that there is no way to win an argument unless you agree with them. So, I let it go.

BUT sometimes my graciousness can be deceptive. I shake the dude's hand and say well done and smile, but inside I'm hauling myself over hot coals and completely tormented and crazy mad at myself for losing and desperate to give it another crack.

[Magic Poriferan]

Yes. I've been called a sore loser many times.

When I was a child up until about fourteen or so, I handled losses very badly. No always losing once, but definitely if I lost two or three times in a row. I would become terribly flustered and hostile, usually cursed, growled, stomped, and was likely to drive people away from playing the game. Throwing and object wasn't out of the question either.

Today, I still have a competitive streak that I try to keep subdued, because I think it's a very unhealthy thing. Losing still makes me upset, actually, but I turn it all inwards now. When I lose, I'm disapponted in myself. That's always been the problem, regardless of how I show it.

[Blackmail!]

I passionately enjoy games and debates, of course, but I never particularly was called a sore loser. Or rather, only when I like to, when I feel in a playful mood... but this is only a comedy.

I tend to enjoy games and debates mostly for their own sake, not for their outcomes. To win is easy (especially for me), to properly lose is an art. If my challenger has enjoyed jousting with me, usually I'm fine.

[whatever]

I never really perceive that I lost an argument, even if the other person thinks that I did :blush:

Anything else I couldn't care less about- I have the attention span of a gnat and easily find something else to preoccupy me whenever I lose at something (whatever that is- I just flat out don't care about winning in many cases as long as I'm amused!)

[Aimahn]

In terms of debate and arguments id say I'm actually pretty gracious in losing, during i'm inwardly focused and somewhat emotionally invested. I really value sound reasoning and intelligence, so in the event of a loss I'm actually somewhat happy because I learned something new and also figured out some weaknesses of my own.

In the physical realm though, I'm probably the worst loser (all is fair in love and war right?) but it's usually a short intense anger that again is directed more inwardly. I think that it's sort of a Jon Mccenroe type drive that is expressed more positively externally but maybe just as negative internally.

[Blackmail!]

Well, there's a situation that can make me quite upset, it's when you're in a team game, and that someone in your own team plays so bad he/she eventually ruins all our efforts.

During those moments, I tend to be less understanding. :steam: But when I'm only the only one involved, I usually don't care about losing.

[ThatGirl]

I am a very gracefull loser because I understand peoples need to cheat. I try not to hold it against them though because thats how I roll...... very cool.

[animenagai]

note to self: go to a star wars convention and start a competition just to see them kill each other.

[Pavilion]

Never been called a sore loser, and I don't think I ever have been a sore loser. People used to get annoyed by my constant attempts to get them to let me redo one of my moves that I made five turns beforehand, but over time that's transformed into inward criticism. "I can't believe I did that" is my new "Wait, I forgot to do something last turn".

I have an ENTJ friend who's a huge sore loser though. He even gets sore when his opposition doesn't try hard enough to make his presumptuously inevitable win gratifying. He always needs to get the last shot in too. I remember playing "sawdust tag" with him in IA back in high school and he didn't get me once. So, frustrated and covered in sawdust, he went to the back room and filled my backpack with sawdust.

[Blackmail!]

I am a very gracefull loser because I understand peoples need to cheat. I try not to hold it against them though because thats how I roll...... very cool.

Well...

Cheating against INTPs can be a delectable hobby. :D

[FDG]

They totally cheat in Madden football. If you're like 10-0 or 11-0 in your season, the computer's going to pick one game where NOTHING goes right for you and you get destroyed no matter what you do, just so you don't go undefeated. A sportswriter I like calls it the "No F***ing Way" game.

That's exactly the kind of cheating I'm talking about and that makes me go absolutely crazy :steam: I'll keep on repeating the match until there's a "fair" result.

[01011010]

I am a very gracefull loser because I understand peoples need to cheat. I try not to hold it against them though because thats how I roll...... very cool.

:laugh:

[Bougal]

I call myself a poor loser :]]

[kyuuei]

It really depends. I HATE to lose at fighting games, and stupid things like that, so I tend to stay away from that sort. boardgames I have NO problem losing I always have fun with them.

When debating, I generally don't feel I've lost anything. If I didn't state my case well enough, it's because I have a lot to learn, in which case I'm more likely to sit and listen to the other person.

If I believe strongly in a subject though, I can be a bit of a brick wall about the whole thing. Even if it didn't make sense to be so stubborn about it, I'd still be.

[heart]

This is one complaint I have not had leveled at me.

Oops, didn't notice this was in the NT section...sorry.

[Nighthawk]

So I have a question for you NT folks, when you lose, how graceful are you?

Pretty graceful. I've had a lot of practice throughout my life ;)

[INTJMom]

I have an INTJ male friend, and oh boy! does he not like losing an argument. We recently played chess together, and I won all 4 times which made me very annoyed with me.

So I have a question for you NT folks, when you lose, how graceful are you?
I used to be a REALLY sore loser!
I don't mind so much if it's a close race
but I hate it when someone is just plain humiliating me.
One time, my husband was beating me really bad at Backgammon and I got so upset,
I flipped the whole board over!
That ended the game.:blush:
I was probably in my early 30's when I did that.

[EffEmDoubleyou]

[COLOR=Blue]I used to be a REALLY sore loser!
I don't mind so much if it's a close race
but I hate it when someone is just plain humiliating me.

That's interesting...with me it's the opposite. If I get completely dominated in a competition, it's easier for me to shrug it off. I tend to think that either there was nothing I could have done, or it just wasn't my day. But close losses get under my skin because I keep rehashing what I might have done differently to turn a close loss into a close win. It'll stay with me.

[Nocapszy]

Called me a sore loser?
I guess they've never lived long enough to finish the sentence, but it usually sounds like that's what they were starting to say.

I should wait 'til they're done talking next time to confirm.

[LadyJaye]

Before or after I push the chessboard off the table?


:cheese:

[Eryndil]

It depends on a number of things. If I think I should have been able to win, I don't take it well because I am frustrated with myself. If the person who won gloats over it, I get irritated. If I feel I am being judged according to how well I do, then losing makes me feel like I've failed. Obviously, I am a sore loser in these cases, though I try to hide it.

Otherwise, I'm generally OK. I am a graceful winner though because I am aware that my opponent may be feeling any of the things I've mentioned above and I don't want to rub their face in it. Also, I value modesty!

[pippi]

I learned pretty quickly that no one will play with you if you are a sore loser or a boastful winner. Taking defeat gracefully is learned.

As someone else said on this thread, you don't get better by playing against opponents you can always beat. So if you want to improve you better get used to losing. It just makes it that much sweeter when you finally win.

[Lithium]

i don't lose

[ygolo]

I'm not a sore loser. I posted about this before. Game playing is like an experiment for me.

Especially in games of chance, I don't play to win, I play to create interesting situations.

This is even more true in arguments. I like to explore what is interesting, or most penetrating, rather than attempt to "win" the argument.

What I do get sore about is when people complain about how I play the game. (I find loop-holes often)

[blanclait]

i don't lose

:D

anyways,
maybe once or twice like 5 yrs ago. I'm not so concerned about losing, rather my mind is always on improving. So it doesn't exactly bothered me as much.

[ed111]

I have an INTJ male friend, and oh boy! does he not like losing an argument. We recently played chess together, and I won all 4 times which made me very annoyed with me.

So I have a question for you NT folks, when you lose, how graceful are you?

I'm a very bad winner, so when I lose it's obvious to everyone that I'm not happy, although I'll always congratulate the winner.

Show me a good loser and I'll show you a loser.

[BerberElla]

Yes. I've been called a sore loser many times.

When I was a child up until about fourteen or so, I handled losses very badly. No always losing once, but definitely if I lost two or three times in a row. I would become terribly flustered and hostile, usually cursed, growled, stomped, and was likely to drive people away from playing the game. Throwing and object wasn't out of the question either.

Today, I still have a competitive streak that I try to keep subdued, because I think it's a very unhealthy thing. Losing still makes me upset, actually, but I turn it all inwards now. When I lose, I'm disapponted in myself. That's always been the problem, regardless of how I show it.

:yes: Sounds like me about a decade ago, in all honesty it wasn't so much the losing the bothered me, I'll even throw a game to cheer up or boost confidence in someone who isn't doing so well. It was the reaction to winning from the other side that made me become hostile and sort of throw a temper tantrum in my own way.

When someone is up in your face going "hooyaeh biiiatch, taste your defeat muahahahaha" and stuff like that, that's what pisses me off, still does.

So if you're an ungracious sore winner, then expect me to the perfect ungracious sore loser in return. :smile:

[Cimarron]

There's a catch here: the sore losers may not admit to it.

[markjENTJ]

i dont mind losing as long as i did my B E S T. if i do my best and still lose i will be likely to see what i id wrong.

but if someone calls me a loser, i'll BE PISSED OFF. (no one has called me that EVER).

the reason for getting PISSED OFF is not losing it's because i'll feel that others will think that I DIDNT DO MY BEST. if they think that mannnnnnnnnn i'll be PISSED OFF, BIG TYM.

but no one dares tell me that.

[Jess]

I am an excellent loser. Well, sometimes.

As a child I was very bad. As you grow older, however, you learn that being upset that you lost won't solve anything. So I learned to find the fun side in losing :) What I find trouble not getting frustrated at, is people gloating that they won, especially in games etc that involve a lot of luck.